In a city known for its data-driven culture, one professional has taken networking to an extreme. Pankaj, a tech worker in Bengaluru, has gone viral on X after sharing that he has spent the last six years tracking his friendships in a Microsoft Excel spreadsheet to calculate their return on investment.
Using a custom system he calls “Ziya,” Pankaj treats his social life like a Customer Relationship Management tool. He quantifies interactions, emotional patterns, and the time needed to maintain deep bonds.
The math of friendship: 192 hours to ‘trust’
According to Pankaj’s six-year dataset, the cost of forming a meaningful relationship is higher than most people think. He breaks down the time needed for a single friendship as follows:
– Trust establishment: 45 to 60 hours over 3 to 6 months.
– Emotional vulnerability: An additional 80 to 120 hours over 12 to 18 months.
Total investment: Between 128 and 192 hours per person just to reach “close friend” status.
Maintenance is also costly: Pankaj says that keeping a bond requires 45 to 65 hours annually, which includes regular chats, life updates, and significant events like birthdays.
‘New friends are negative ROI’
The most controversial part of Pankaj’s analysis is his view on new acquaintances. From 2019 to 2025, he tried to build six new close friendships. Despite putting in 354 hours, he realised these people became “just names” in his phone.
“I literally quantify friendships,” Pankaj wrote. “If someone’s ROI stays negative long enough, I stop engaging. Pretending time is infinite is worse than being transactional.”
https://t.co/cV8xxvnR2z— Pankaj (@the2ndfloorguy) February 16, 2026
His data shows a 73% failure rate for any new friendship formed after age 25 within the first two years. As a result, he has effectively closed his friend list to new people, focusing on his four existing close friends of over a decade.
Limited emotional bandwidth
Pankaj’s uncomfortable realization is that our ability to form deep connections is limited. His spreadsheet indicates a strict cap on social ties:
– Deep Relationships: 5 to 8 maximum.
– Meaningful Connections: 10 to 12 maximum.
He argues that adding a new person to this inner circle can weaken existing bonds or push a long-time friend out.
Social media reaction: Dystopian or disciplined?
The post has split opinions online. Some users praised the “peak Bengaluru efficiency,” while others felt unsettled by the cold approach to human relationships.
The critics: “A very weird way to look at life… conversations are not a means to an end,” one user commented, suggesting that having fun should be the only return on investment needed.
The supporters: Others found the analysis “brutal but honest,” saying that being intentional about how we spend our limited time is a tough lesson learned in adulthood.
Pankaj remains firm in his view. He notes that while his data is personal and not definitive proof, it has helped him stop wasting energy on superficial connections and focus more on his inner circle.
